Twisted Metal Tour - Grid Iron Division 2015 - 34-36 Humpty Dumpty

The final WildCard race at old (actually, new) Humpty Dumpty raceway.  It's not actually a roadcourse but it feels like one. thanks to the elevation changes.  Thanks to the haybails and other soft barriers, danger is aplenty here.  Let's see what happens!

First, we need to establish who was up and what the stakes were.  The first draw was Scot, who happened to be in tonight.  The second team was yours truly.  Yes, a family feud between the Outlaw and...inlaw?

If Scot took the night, his 20 something placed Ducks would rocket to number one with a healthy margin.  He and his Jets would also be well positioned to not only have him finish well by series end, but they might score enough bonus points to take the win!  If I won, my Seminoles would move up to the top 5 and that would position both my teammates highest in their respective categories and almost guaranteeing me a series win.

Certainly a do or die scenario.  Because it's a team wildcard, total awards by night's end would win the day.  That sounds awkward.  Anyway:

Race 1:

Scot was set up to potentially get the hard charger award while he and Sandy started well back from the field.

I was also towards the back and got caught on the Jets.  Then I got caught on a bail of hay.

At that point I got a tow and resigned myself to be in last place for the Diehard Award.

But it would mean placing last and absolutely last without killing myself.

So I opted to wreck everyone I could get my bumper on.  Especially kin!  Although this was a result of me not paying attention while figuring out where people were on track.  And not actually watching the track.

Overall I was successful.

Even teammates got involved in my efforts.  Stupid horse.

We even got carried away and charged straight into some massive wrecks  Oh, there's Darrel's avatar.  Apparently he was sick and couldn't join.

In the end I got my last place finish and earned the Diehard award.  But it wasn't as simple as just smashing everyone else up and driving slow as you'll soon see.

While Sandy wasn't trying to be in the back of the pack, he was in the bottom for most of the race.

Although, he had help...Scot...

...and others...

...even himself.

All his efforts were not helping me as he hung around the back of the field.

Of course, I wasn't helping much either.

But with the power of the swan...

...he got back in the hunt.

But was also hunted.

And he also got to see that ridiculous wreck in turn one.  Crazy.

Zack tried to even push him down while knocking guys into his path.

Things weren't going very well for Scot either.  From the start, he made it through the maelstrom and sent Sandy packing.

And Zack.

Not long after that, he found himself taking a trip.

Repeatedly.

Most of the time he landed on his feet...

...but he spent almost as much time in his pits as I did.

Yep.

Sandy made sure to run over some of his crew on entry.  Sporting.

Despite his efforts, though, Scot finished 42nd and I would take the coveted 43rd and the Diehard.  After round one I was up by one award.

Zack's race started strong with him mid pack

Things quickly turned sour as he got knocked around.

And then his internet...

...was knocked out.

He eventually rejoined and I awarded him laps back until he was returned to his original position.

Otherwise he might have taken the Diehard AND the Heartache.

Race 2:

The second round started like the first with humans at the back.

We stayed close.  A little too close.

When the schmit hit the fan, I got lucky and shot through a gap.

I was avoiding conflagrations and working my way towards the Hard Charger award.  And maybe the Front of the Pack Award (most laps lead).

But in Cowboy style...

...they screwed things up for me.

So, with my race ruined, my only chance was to keep Scot's Ducks from getting the Front Runner award.  But I just missed them.

And I bounced back into the Buccaneers.

Then over pit wall.  Dead.  But at least I got the Diehard.  At this point, 2-Me 0-Scot.

Sandy was having a more eventful event compared to the opener at this track.

He kept out of the way and avoided overzealous companions.

And took home a nice top twenty.

Scot was working a similar strategy as mine.

He was staying out of trouble and climbing the order.

Coming around turn one, USC was just sitting there and he went evasive.

That tacky cobblestone caught his tires and he rolled.

His engine then started to let go and it seemed all was lost.

However, his crew went to work.

And he was out destroying things all over again.

All their hard work for nothing.

Zack was a little more aggressive but also used the off-line to keep away from the worst of the scuffles.

He still had to work.

There are no safe places.

At several points he could have taken out the Ducks and gained a precious position.  But he let them go in the hopes that I would get knocked out of 1st come the end of the Wildcard.

The Ducks did finish unmolested and led every lap, earning an award for Freak Gasoline Fight Accident.

Race 3:

For those keeping track at home, Scot is only one award behind me.  He could potentially tie or possibly pass me for the win.  Let's see.

Things started off on par with a big smokey pile in turn one.

I worked up past Zack which was a major step towards an award.  If I could pass him and maintain that position, I could potential earn the Hard Charger.

We all seemed to spend most of the time avoiding wrecks or our own teammates.

And each other.

Zack was pushing hard to catch up to me and help Scot get those awards.

Most of his time was spent narrowly avoiding others.

Scot was actually running up ahead of us when the Buccs took a corner off his car.

He ran to the pits and made some repairs.  Down but not out.  He was now on a mission for blood.

Sandy was on a mission for avoiding chaos and finding ice cream.

I had made it to second with only a couple laps left when I caught up to Scot.  At this point, if he had even just slowed me down, Zack could have caught up and passed, costing me the Hard Charger Award.

So I juked low and narrowly avoided his wrath.  Zack was unable to catch me on the final lap and I got the award.  Sadly for Scot, he happened to earn the Die Hard Award and only had to keep me from earning mine.  We would have been tied and it would have come down to the two lowest teammate's points being compared.  Poor Scot had actually just burst into the top 5 in the standings and now falls back to 12th.  But he's got time to make up points and there's not much of a gap to cover.

Last two tracks.  Next up is the little arena: Quarter Slammer

Race 1

Session: Practice

P	#	DRIVER	TIME
1	58	P Steelers	24.033
2	42	M Wolverines	24.045
3	38	A Cardinals	24.062
4	85	U Trojans	24.093
5	7	D Hamilton	24.136
6	21	S Chargers	24.165
7	16	S 49ers	24.190
8	20	B Ravens	24.240
9	45	H Texans	24.254
10	75	O Raiders	24.267
11	60	I Colts	24.268
12	13	S Hagerty	24.301
13	39	G Bulldogs	24.302
14	10	B Bills	24.321
15	47	F Gators	24.326
16	23	Z Webster	24.330
17	62	J Jaguars	24.334
18	83	C Bears	24.336
19	11	T Longhorns	24.341
20	32	K Chiefs	24.354
21	73	T Buccaneers	24.405
22	33	S Seahawks	24.459
23	12	N Patriots	24.483
24	52	T Titans	24.510
25	22	C Ferguson	24.513
26	80	D Lions	24.520
27	37	P Eagles	24.522
28	88	N Saints	24.543
29	31	O Buckeyes	24.549
30	99	D Cowboys	24.561
31	81	F Seminoles	24.565
32	28	R Cook	24.570
33	61	A Crimson Tide	24.603
34	44	N Fighting Irish	24.623
35	34	N Giants	24.661
36	27	O Ducks	24.662
37	29	G Packers	24.716
38	95	B Man	24.768
39	55	L Tigers	24.823
40	98	N Jets	24.857
41	56	M Max	24.886
42	63	T Bear	25.599

Weather: Clear, 59 °F, North 8 mph

Session: Qualifying

P	#	DRIVER	TIME
1	12	N Patriots	23.341
2	33	S Seahawks	23.491
3	16	S 49ers	23.514
4	55	L Tigers	23.916
5	45	H Texans	23.931
6	28	R Cook	23.936
7	32	K Chiefs	23.951
8	23	Z Webster	23.962
9	60	I Colts	23.982
10	62	J Jaguars	23.989
11	98	N Jets	24.008
12	95	B Man	24.037
13	22	C Ferguson	24.058
14	42	M Wolverines	24.065
15	58	P Steelers	24.068
16	73	T Buccaneers	24.083
17	88	N Saints	24.089
18	29	G Packers	24.094
19	38	A Cardinals	24.109
20	85	U Trojans	24.118
21	81	F Seminoles	24.119
22	80	D Lions	24.129
23	13	S Hagerty	24.129
24	27	O Ducks	24.138
25	47	F Gators	24.162
26	99	D Cowboys	24.166
27	21	S Chargers	24.180
28	20	B Ravens	24.181
29	7	D Hamilton	24.185
30	61	A Crimson Tide	24.222
31	52	T Titans	24.234
32	83	C Bears	24.255
33	39	G Bulldogs	24.265
34	34	N Giants	24.272
35	11	T Longhorns	24.281
36	75	O Raiders	24.285
37	37	P Eagles	24.319
38	86	T Nadz	24.325
39	31	O Buckeyes	24.521
40	10	B Bills	24.660
41	44	N Fighting Irish	26.389
42	63	T Bear	--
43	56	M Max	--

Weather: Clear, 59 °F, Northwest 15 mph

Session: Happy Hour

P	#	DRIVER	TIME
1	86	T Nadz	24.390
2	22	C Ferguson	24.643
3	23	Z Webster	24.653
4	13	S Hagerty	24.668
5	16	S 49ers	24.677
6	37	P Eagles	24.694
7	99	D Cowboys	24.727
8	33	S Seahawks	24.738
9	61	A Crimson Tide	24.744
10	83	C Bears	24.753
11	73	T Buccaneers	24.815
12	44	N Fighting Irish	24.835
13	80	D Lions	24.851
14	10	B Bills	24.870
15	88	N Saints	24.873
16	98	N Jets	24.878
17	34	N Giants	24.892
18	55	L Tigers	24.906
19	62	J Jaguars	24.926
20	29	G Packers	24.928
21	32	K Chiefs	25.003
22	12	N Patriots	25.007
23	11	T Longhorns	25.028
24	21	S Chargers	25.042
25	58	P Steelers	25.054
26	75	O Raiders	25.084
27	60	I Colts	25.094
28	95	B Man	25.095
29	27	O Ducks	25.116
30	45	H Texans	25.161
31	52	T Titans	25.174
32	81	F Seminoles	25.186
33	31	O Buckeyes	25.231
34	39	G Bulldogs	25.266
35	47	F Gators	25.282
36	28	R Cook	25.304
37	20	B Ravens	25.497
38	42	M Wolverines	25.501
39	85	U Trojans	25.557
40	38	A Cardinals	25.565
41	56	M Max	25.851
42	7	D Hamilton	26.449
43	63	T Bear	27.152

Weather: Clear, 109 °F, Northwest 13 mph

Session: Race

OFFICIAL STANDINGS

F	S	#	DRIVER	INTERVAL	LAPS	LED	POINTS	STATUS
1	3	16	S 49ers	137.552	40	19*	185	Running
2	27	21	S Chargers	-4.40	40	0	170	Running
3	23	13	S Hagerty	-7.75	40	0	165	Running
4	14	42	M Wolverines	-8.82	40	1	165	Running
5	20	85	U Trojans	-11.56	40	0	155	Running
6	21	81	F Seminoles	-15.05	40	0	150	Running
7	39	31	O Buckeyes	-16.13	40	0	146	Running
8	32	83	C Bears	-20.10	40	0	142	Running
9	29	7	D Hamilton	-20.20	40	0	138	Running
10	7	32	K Chiefs	-20.82	40	0	134	Running
11	28	20	B Ravens	-22.38	40	0	130	Running
12	13	22	C Ferguson	-23.76	40	0	127	Running
13	26	99	D Cowboys	-24.62	40	0	124	Running
14	19	38	A Cardinals	-1L	39	0	121	Running
15	33	39	G Bulldogs	-1L	39	0	118	Running
16	40	10	B Bills	-1L	39	0	115	Running
17	24	27	O Ducks	-1L	39	0	112	Running
18	6	28	R Cook	-1L	39	0	109	Running
19	41	44	N Fighting Irish	-1L	39	0	106	Running
20	16	73	T Buccaneers	-1L	39	0	103	Running
21	35	11	T Longhorns	-1L	39	0	100	Running
22	17	88	N Saints	-1L	39	9	102	Running
23	31	52	T Titans	-1L	39	0	94	Running
24	9	60	I Colts	-1L	39	0	91	Running
25	11	98	N Jets	-1L	39	0	88	Running
26	30	61	A Crimson Tide	-1L	39	0	85	Running
27	25	47	F Gators	-1L	39	0	82	Running
28	10	62	J Jaguars	-1L	39	0	79	Running
29	22	80	D Lions	-2L	38	0	76	Running
30	5	45	H Texans	-2L	38	0	73	Running
31	36	75	O Raiders	-2L	38	0	70	Running
32	1	12	N Patriots	-2L	38	7	72	Running
33	18	29	G Packers	-2L	38	0	64	Running
34	15	58	P Steelers	-2L	38	0	61	Running
35	2	33	S Seahawks	-2L	38	0	58	Running
36	12	95	B Man	-2L	38	0	55	Running
37	8	23	Z Webster	-8L	32	0	52	Running
38	34	34	N Giants	-10L	30	0	49	Running
39	37	37	P Eagles	-10L	30	0	46	Running
40	4	55	L Tigers	-10L	30	4	48	Running
41	42	63	T Bear	-12L	28	0	40	Running
42	43	56	M Max	-18L	22	0	37	Running
43	38	86	T Nadz	-24L	16	0	34	Running

Caution Flags: 0 (0 laps)

Lead Changes: 7 (5 drivers)

Weather: Clear, 108 °F, Southwest 16 mph

Pitstop Frequency: 1x

AI Strength: 95%

PENALTIES

LAP	#	INFRACTION	PENALTY
14	86	Unsafe pit exit	Stop and go

Race 2

Session: Qualifying

P	#	DRIVER	TIME
1	27	O Ducks	24.313
2	73	T Buccaneers	24.313
3	20	B Ravens	24.329
4	31	O Buckeyes	24.345
5	83	C Bears	24.359
6	10	B Bills	24.371
7	33	S Seahawks	24.373
8	62	J Jaguars	24.397
9	44	N Fighting Irish	24.399
10	55	L Tigers	24.405
11	98	N Jets	24.413
12	88	N Saints	24.416
13	85	U Trojans	24.442
14	21	S Chargers	24.445
15	32	K Chiefs	24.446
16	61	A Crimson Tide	24.474
17	95	B Man	24.491
18	13	S Hagerty	24.497
19	58	P Steelers	24.500
20	11	T Longhorns	24.503
21	47	F Gators	24.516
22	12	N Patriots	24.524
23	28	R Cook	24.527
24	16	S 49ers	24.543
25	99	D Cowboys	24.547
26	80	D Lions	24.557
27	38	A Cardinals	24.558
28	52	T Titans	24.562
29	37	P Eagles	24.564
30	75	O Raiders	24.582
31	39	G Bulldogs	24.584
32	81	F Seminoles	24.596
33	42	M Wolverines	24.611
34	56	M Max	24.623
35	22	C Ferguson	24.629
36	60	I Colts	24.630
37	34	N Giants	24.644
38	29	G Packers	24.658
39	45	H Texans	24.723
40	63	T Bear	25.727
41	7	D Hamilton	31.099
42	86	T Nadz	--
43	23	Z Webster	--

Weather: Clear, 95 °F, North 10 mph

Session: Race

OFFICIAL STANDINGS

F	S	#	DRIVER	INTERVAL	LAPS	LED	POINTS	STATUS
1	1	27	O Ducks	140.679	20	20*	185	Running
2	30	75	O Raiders	-5.45	20	0	170	Running
3	35	22	C Ferguson	-7.57	20	0	165	Running
4	15	32	K Chiefs	-7.67	20	0	160	Running
5	36	60	I Colts	-8.83	20	0	155	Running
6	18	13	S Hagerty	-10.13	20	0	150	Running
7	37	34	N Giants	-10.73	20	0	146	Running
8	6	10	B Bills	-13.46	20	0	142	Running
9	9	44	N Fighting Irish	-14.77	20	0	138	Running
10	27	38	A Cardinals	-17.59	20	0	134	Running
11	39	45	H Texans	-19.16	20	0	130	Running
12	33	42	M Wolverines	-20.91	20	0	127	Running
13	25	99	D Cowboys	-25.05	20	0	124	Running
14	12	88	N Saints	-28.23	20	0	121	Running
15	21	47	F Gators	-1L	19	0	118	Running
16	11	98	N Jets	-1L	19	0	115	Running
17	43	23	Z Webster	-1L	19	0	112	Running
18	24	16	S 49ers	-1L	19	0	109	Running
19	22	12	N Patriots	-2L	18	0	106	Running
20	32	81	F Seminoles	-2L	18	0	103	Running
21	20	11	T Longhorns	-2L	18	0	100	Running
22	10	55	L Tigers	-2L	18	0	97	Running
23	40	63	T Bear	-3L	17	0	94	Running
24	19	58	P Steelers	-4L	16	0	91	Running
25	23	28	R Cook	-4L	16	0	88	Running
26	7	33	S Seahawks	-4L	16	0	85	Running
27	31	39	G Bulldogs	-4L	16	0	82	Running
28	8	62	J Jaguars	-5L	15	0	79	Running
29	4	31	O Buckeyes	-6L	14	0	76	Running
30	29	37	P Eagles	-7L	13	0	73	Retired
31	34	56	M Max	-7L	13	0	70	Running
32	5	83	C Bears	-10L	10	0	67	Running
33	28	52	T Titans	-11L	9	0	64	Accident
34	2	73	T Buccaneers	-11L	9	0	61	Accident
35	13	85	U Trojans	-11L	9	0	58	Retired
36	14	21	S Chargers	-12L	8	0	55	Accident
37	42	86	T Nadz	-13L	7	0	52	Running
38	16	61	A Crimson Tide	-13L	7	0	49	Retired
39	17	95	B Man	-14L	6	0	46	Accident
40	3	20	B Ravens	-16L	4	0	43	Accident
41	41	7	D Hamilton	-17L	3	0	40	Accident
42	38	29	G Packers	-18L	2	0	37	Accident
43	26	80	D Lions	-18L	2	0	34	Accident

Caution Flags: 0 (0 laps)

Lead Changes: 0 (1 driver)

Weather: Clear, 95 °F, West 5 mph

Pitstop Frequency: 1x

AI Strength: 95%

PENALTIES

LAP

#

INFRACTION

PENALTY

Race 3

Session: Qualifying

P	#	DRIVER	TIME
1	99	D Cowboys	24.325
2	81	F Seminoles	24.424
3	88	N Saints	24.439
4	45	H Texans	24.453
5	60	I Colts	24.461
6	28	R Cook	24.473
7	32	K Chiefs	24.511
8	33	S Seahawks	24.517
9	29	G Packers	24.546
10	42	M Wolverines	24.550
11	80	D Lions	24.557
12	20	B Ravens	24.562
13	85	U Trojans	24.563
14	34	N Giants	24.565
15	37	P Eagles	24.578
16	21	S Chargers	24.592
17	7	D Hamilton	24.598
18	61	A Crimson Tide	24.608
19	52	T Titans	24.611
20	95	B Man	24.615
21	83	C Bears	24.625
22	55	L Tigers	24.626
23	22	C Ferguson	24.650
24	62	J Jaguars	24.654
25	11	T Longhorns	24.656
26	44	N Fighting Irish	24.657
27	47	F Gators	24.661
28	75	O Raiders	24.661
29	12	N Patriots	24.664
30	58	P Steelers	24.706
31	31	O Buckeyes	24.713
32	73	T Buccaneers	24.719
33	38	A Cardinals	24.738
34	13	S Hagerty	24.766
35	98	N Jets	24.802
36	39	G Bulldogs	24.808
37	10	B Bills	24.953
38	56	M Max	25.472
39	63	T Bear	25.703
40	27	O Ducks	31.193
41	16	S 49ers	--
42	23	Z Webster	--
43	86	T Nadz	--

Weather: Clear, 105 °F, East 11 mph

Session: Race

OFFICIAL STANDINGS

F	S	#	DRIVER	INTERVAL	LAPS	LED	POINTS	STATUS
1	23	22	C Ferguson	139.657	20	3	180	Running
2	43	86	T Nadz	-10.12	20	0	170	Running
3	25	11	T Longhorns	-13.00	20	0	165	Running
4	42	23	Z Webster	-13.77	20	0	160	Running
5	6	28	R Cook	-15.80	20	0	155	Running
6	1	99	D Cowboys	-16.58	20	5*	160	Running
7	40	27	O Ducks	-1L	19	0	146	Camshaft
8	22	55	L Tigers	-2L	18	0	142	Running
9	30	58	P Steelers	-3L	17	3	143	Accident
10	39	63	T Bear	-3L	17	0	134	Running
11	5	60	I Colts	-3L	17	3	135	Running
12	27	47	F Gators	-4L	16	0	127	Accident
13	9	29	G Packers	-4L	16	0	124	Accident
14	34	13	S Hagerty	-4L	16	0	121	Running
15	37	10	B Bills	-5L	15	0	118	Accident
16	38	56	M Max	-5L	15	0	115	Running
17	2	81	F Seminoles	-6L	14	1	117	Accident
18	10	42	M Wolverines	-6L	14	0	109	Accident
19	14	34	N Giants	-8L	12	0	106	Accident
20	4	45	H Texans	-8L	12	0	103	Accident
21	15	37	P Eagles	-8L	12	4	105	Accident
22	3	88	N Saints	-8L	12	1	102	Accident
23	31	31	O Buckeyes	-9L	11	0	94	Accident
24	32	73	T Buccaneers	-9L	11	0	91	Accident
25	11	80	D Lions	-10L	10	0	88	Accident
26	35	98	N Jets	-11L	9	0	85	Accident
27	17	7	D Hamilton	-14L	6	0	82	Retired
28	33	38	A Cardinals	-15L	5	0	79	Retired
29	18	61	A Crimson Tide	-15L	5	0	76	Piston
30	28	75	O Raiders	-16L	4	0	73	Accident
31	36	39	G Bulldogs	-16L	4	0	70	Accident
32	7	32	K Chiefs	-17L	3	0	67	Accident
33	13	85	U Trojans	-17L	3	0	64	Accident
34	29	12	N Patriots	-18L	2	0	61	Accident
35	24	62	J Jaguars	-18L	2	0	58	Retired
36	20	95	B Man	-18L	2	0	55	Accident
37	12	20	B Ravens	-19L	1	0	52	Accident
38	16	21	S Chargers	-19L	1	0	49	Accident
39	8	33	S Seahawks	-19L	1	0	46	Accident
40	21	83	C Bears	-19L	1	0	43	Accident
41	19	52	T Titans	-19L	1	0	40	Accident
42	26	44	N Fighting Irish	-20L	0	0	37	Accident
43	41	16	S 49ers	-20L	0	0	34	Accident

Caution Flags: 0 (0 laps)

Lead Changes: 7 (7 drivers)

Weather: Clear, 105 °F, Northeast 7 mph

Pitstop Frequency: 1x

AI Strength: 95%

PENALTIES

LAP

#

INFRACTION

PENALTY